I wasn’t allowed to celebrate Halloween when I was growing up. Truth be told, I didn’t mind much. I was pulled out of school early before the Halloween parade started, and loved spending the afternoon hanging out with my mom. And we always attended a church sponsored party that evening, which involved renting out the local indoor pool, and getting a big bag of candy that all the church families pitched in to provide. Not too shabby.
When we had kids, I wasn’t sure what we would do about Halloween. I didn’t have the same misgivings as my parents–which was, that the holiday’s roots were evil and against the foundations of Christianity–but I didn’t see much point in dressing up my kids and going door to door to ask for candy from strangers.
The past few years, hubby and I have bought our kids costumes (usually nabbed on clearance the year before), and gone to the local pumpkin patch on Halloween for hay rides, photos and apple cider. This year though, our oldest is in kindergarten, and came home declaring his desire to go trick-or-treating. We would have to be out past his bedtime, and we don’t know our neighbours, but we didn’t want him to miss out. We said yes.
Halloween morning, we woke up to rain. It wasn’t just a drizzle–it was pouring. I went out and bought an umbrella to replace our old broken one, and after spending the day at school in his costume, we bundled up the kids and took them trick-or-treating. I am so glad we did.
We don’t live in the best neighbourhood. We live in a poorer area of an economically disadvantaged city, the center of which used to be the auto industry. Our city has a reputation, and we have allowed that reputation–and some of our personal experiences here–to prejudice us against our neighbours.
On Halloween, I saw a different side to the place where we live. Kids were out with their devoted parents, dressed up adorably, and happy despite the crummy weather. People greeted each other on the streets, ooh-ing and ahh-ing at how cute all of our children were, and the residents of the homes were friendly, kind, and generous. I experienced something I haven’t really felt since moving here: Community.
Money, education, and employment status do not dictate peoples’ ability to be warm and welcoming. If it wasn’t for the rain, I would have wanted to stay out longer. We had a blast.
The other aspect of this Halloween that I LOVED, involved my son’s costume. For months he has been saying that he wanted to be Rainbow Dash from My Little Pony for Halloween. I looked online, but could not swing $50+ shipping for one costume, so my friend Emma, who I have never met in person but know through a mom forum, offered to make my son’s costume. He absolutely loved it, so much so that he insisted in sleeping in it that night, and has worn the ears and mane to school for the past two days.
Aside from my friend’s generosity, there is something else about my son getting his wish. The fact that he wanted to dress up as a female character for Halloween was not lost on me. I am not making any declarations about my son and his gender identity–he loves ponies and pink, and he also loves cars and Transformers and pretending to do karate. He is balanced. He has not yet been touched by assumptions about what is for girls, and what is for boys. He simply is who he is–he likes what he likes. When I was in school, a young boy would have been tormented for admitting to liking My Little Pony. Now, it is no big deal. I’m not saying he didn’t catch some flak–I’m sure there are parents out there who judge my husband and I for allowing my son to wear his costume of choice. I’m sure there are kids out there who thought it was strange, and that he may have even been teased a little bit. But the tide is turning, and that thrills me.
I hope all of your Halloweens were as illuminating as mine. Long live neighbourliness, and kids simply being who they are.
P.S. Just a few years ago, my parents started handing out candy on Halloween. Whatever your thoughts on the holiday, I think its great that you are never too old to change your views and loosen up a bit.
Happy November!
Words, Rants, Rock n Roll 